Rethinking Emotional Intelligence in Hiring: A More Inclusive Approach

In today’s workplaces, emotional intelligence (EI) is often seen as a critical trait for successful employees and leaders. But when it comes to hiring, the way we define and assess EI can unintentionally disadvantage candidates — particularly those who are neurodivergent or communicate in nontraditional ways.

So how can hiring teams ensure they’re evaluating emotional intelligence fairly, without missing out on talented individuals who may simply express it differently?

Emotional Intelligence Isn’t One-Size-Fits-All

It’s tempting to reduce emotional intelligence to a list of visible behaviours — like eye contact, facial expressions, or verbal empathy. But these are just one way of demonstrating EI, often shaped by neurotypical communication norms.

Every person processes and expresses emotions differently. Neurotypes can influence how emotional intelligence shows up, but they don’t define it. Reducing someone’s communication style to a diagnosis — “ADHD people are like this” or “Autistic people do that” — risks reinforcing stereotypes and missing the richness of individual experience.

At Unlocking the Neuroverse, we believe that emotional intelligence should be understood in context — not judged against a fixed social script.

What Does Emotional Intelligence Actually Look Like?

Here are just a few examples of how emotional intelligence may show up differently:

• Person A uses non-verbal cues such as eye contact, tone, and facial expressions to empathise and connect. Their emotional intelligence is visible and easily recognised.

• Person B may not rely on non-verbal communication. Instead, they demonstrate emotional intelligence through deep listening, thoughtful responses, or practical support that genuinely helps others.

• Person C shows emotional intelligence through enthusiasm and creative energy. They may struggle with emotional regulation — not from a lack of empathy, but from heightened emotional sensitivity, which can be supported with the right strategies.

These variations are not better or worse — just different. And unless interviewers are trained to spot and appreciate those differences, many highly emotionally intelligent candidates risk being overlooked.

How to Assess Emotional Intelligence More Inclusively

Shifting toward a more inclusive hiring process means designing assessments that reflect the diversity of emotional expression and communication styles. Here are some practical ways to get started:

1. Be Transparent from the Start

In your job adverts or candidate packs, clearly state if emotional intelligence is a key part of the role — whether it’s empathy, collaboration, or communication. Let candidates know they’ll be asked about these areas in interviews so they can prepare meaningfully.

2. Share Interview Questions in Advance

This is especially helpful for neurodivergent candidates who may need more time to process abstract or emotionally complex questions. It reduces anxiety and encourages more reflective, authentic answers.

3. Offer Alternative Ways to Respond

Not everyone expresses themselves best in a live interview. Offer options like:

• Written responses to EI-related questions

• Pre-recorded video or voice notes

• A short presentation prepared in advance

These alternatives allow candidates to articulate their experiences in ways that suit their communication preferences.

4. Ask Values-Based Questions

Explore how candidates think about empathy and team dynamics:

• “What role does empathy play in how you approach your work?”

• “Tell us about a value that guides how you support your colleagues or clients.”

These prompts move the conversation beyond surface-level behaviour and into the heart of how people relate to others.

5. Let Candidates Define Their Own Style

Ask them:

• “How do you typically show support to a colleague going through a tough time?”

• “How do you approach emotionally sensitive conversations?”

This opens the door for candidates to describe their emotional intelligence in their own words — rather than being judged against someone else’s standard.

Avoiding Bias in Interviews

Even well-intentioned interviewers can inadvertently lean on social norms that favour neurotypical behaviours. To reduce this bias:

• Offer flexible formats (written, verbal, virtual)

• Provide breaks or additional processing time

• Avoid relying on “gut feeling” or “cultural fit”

• Train interviewers on neurodiversity and inclusive communication

• Use structured scoring rubrics based on the content of answers, not delivery style

Redefining Emotional Intelligence Benefits Everyone

This isn’t just about accommodating neurodivergent candidates — it’s about building a hiring process that’s more thoughtful, more human, and ultimately more effective. Emotional intelligence can take many forms: quiet empathy, analytical problem-solving, creative energy, or sensitive self-awareness.

By expanding how we understand and assess EI, we create space for everyone to show up fully — and that’s when real inclusion begins.

💡 Want to Create a More Neuroinclusive Hiring Process?

At Unlocking the Neuroverse, we help organisations build inclusive recruitment strategies that work for all neurotypes. Whether you're redesigning interview formats or training hiring managers on neurodiversity, we're here to help.

📩 Contact us to find out how we can support your team.